6 Ways To Be A Good Friend

The Health Benefits of Friendship and a Strong Support Network

Mar 22, 2007

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Find out how to be a good friend and enjoy a strong support network. These health benefits of friendship may surprise you.

The health benefits of friendship include a longer, healthier life. Plus, being a good friend makes your life more fun, interesting, and easy to handle! Another health benefit of friendship is that when you have even one best or close friend, your attitude and ability to deal with stress and problems is greatly increased.

Surprisingly, even spending time with an intimate partner doesn't provide the same health benefits as friendship. Good friends offer a different kind of support than lovers, siblings, parents, or children do. Good friends provide a different level of understanding and communication -- and this positively affects your health, wellness, and attitude. Strong feelings of connectedness is another health benefit of friendship.

The Health Benefits of Friendship

Stressed-out hamsters with skin wounds who were paired with other hamsters healed faster than those left alone to heal. The hamsters with friends also produced less of the stress hormone cortisol, which has negative effects on mood and immunity. You may not be a hamster, but the effects are transferable to human friends. If you're depressed, recuperating from an illness, or stressed you'll heal and deal faster with friends. This is a huge health benefit of friendship.

Researchers haven’t figured out exactly how, but friends boost your immune system. Good friends help you relax, take a deep breath, and remember what really matters – and why. The connection and relationship you feel when you’re with your friends boosts your feelings of hope, faith, and belief that things will be Okay. Friends provide comfort and companionship, laughter and honesty. A strong support network can also keep you motivated and energized! This is why it's important to know how to be a good friend.

A strong support network isn't just about emotions and feelings. A huge health benefit of friendship is moral support. Practically speaking, when a friend accompanies you to a doctor’s appointment or medical procedure, you’ll likely experience lower blood pressure and a slower heart rate. You’ll heal faster and live longer. Without social ties or friends to keep you going, you’re more likely to experience negative emotions, more illnesses, and even earlier death than normal. A strong support network will keep you alive and well.

6 Ways To Be A Good Friend

Spend time together. If you can’t go for walks or to yoga class together, then telephone or email your friend regularly. The conversations needn’t be long or personal; those quick “I’m thinking of you” moments can go a long way in making a strong support network.
Make friends a priority. Maybe you “should” clean the house, wash the dog, go grocery shopping, or watch tv (some people feel they should do that!). But give those “shoulds” the brush and prioritize your friendships. There will be plenty of time for those “shoulds” when you’re dead. For now, think about the health benefits of friendship.
Be there for the good and bad. Show up for the funerals and the weddings, the surgeries and the celebrations! Be sincerely sad or genuinely happy for your friend – and include them on the good and bad in your life, too. One way to be a good friend is to be inclusive.
Don’t keep score. Who called who last? Who bought lunch last? Who spent the most on Christmas gifts? Who forgot whose birthday? Who cares? If you have a good friend, cut a little slack. If your friendship really isn’t that great, then maybe you need to re-evaluate it. The health benefits of friendship will outlast the score-keeping cards.
Notice the little stuff. The conversations that matter the most are the quick little ones that last only a few minutes. It’s not always the deep long heart-to-hearts that bond friends together -- it's the day to day minutiae of everyday life. One way to be a good friend is to have short, sweet conversations.
Focus on the positive. We all have quirks and weaknesses; focusing on your friend’s strengths and wonderful qualities will keep your friendship alive and strong. To be a good friend, forget about the things you wish were different.

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The copyright of the article 6 Ways To Be A Good Friend in Child Psychology is owned by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen. Permission to republish 6 Ways To Be A Good Friend must be granted by the author in writing.